A pleasant evening at home and I was watching the wimbledon men's final between Roger Federer Vs Rafel Nadal. Federer was in absolute command and won the first set 6 Love. Being a Federer fan, I was jumping around shouting 6 Love. My 3 yr old son asked " Daddy what does Love mean ?". Without taking my eyes of the television, I replied "Love means nothing". He looked into my eyes and asked "Why is there no value for love ?, Doesnt Love count for anything ?
If you ask a mouse about the sharpest thing in the world, the reply would be a cat's teeth. If you ask a kitten about the softest thing in the world, the reply would still be the cat's teeth. The same cat which brutally destroys the mouse with its teeth, transforms into a loving mother and carrys its kitten softly with the same teeth.
As human beings we are no different from the cat, when it comes to exhibiting different characteristics to different people. In fact, the person that you might consider to be the most disgusting might be the most lovable husband / wife of another human being.
Similar to the cat's teeth, all of us possess a "sharp stinging snake" - our natural ability to criticize people. A snake that comes stinging out at the first possible sign of deficiency in other people.
"The guy in the opposite flat - he is an absolute moron" - because he failed to hold the lift for me....
"It takes a man of class to recognise talent. Unfortuntely our boss belongs to the 3rd class in this aspect" - because he gave me less increment.
"You spend a fortune on the telphone, half my salary is spent in paying etisalat bills" - Wife has spent an additional 100 dhs on telephone bill.
The snake spews venom, causing pain and discomfort to our fellow human beings. You can see this stinging snake all around us, in every aspect of our life. But there is one place, where the "snake" is kept under check ...
To be continued....
Saturday, July 29, 2006
Monday, January 30, 2006
In Life, there are no winners, only survivors !
When man was is in the primitive age, hunting for food, the concept of survival of the fittest was probably applicable. However, for some inexplicable reason, we as a human race have not grown out of this mindset of winning at all costs. We do not even bat an eyelid while stepping on a fellow human to achieve another hollow victory. Love, an all conquering emotion has been quietly sidelined in our pursuit for moving forward. Life cannot be treated as series of contests where your sole objective is to win at all costs. Life is journey and it is important to enjoy that experience and to share your joy/pain with your fellow beings.
Sunday, January 15, 2006
Imagination is better than Knowledge ?
In a recent edition of toastmasters, I was given this topic to make an impromptu speech and the following were my random thoughts on the subject.
Imagination is better than knowledge ?. A tricky question to answer. Similar to the chicken and the egg scenario, it is not always possible to clearly define what is more important.
Take the case of Adam and Eve. When they were frolicking in the garden of eden, all their imagination would not have helped them had they not had the knowledge of what is wrong and what is right. It is the knowledge, the capacity to differentiate between right and wrong that helped them move mankind forward. In effect, imagination without a semblance of knowledge would not be very effective.
On the other hand, take the case of Newton and the apple. It was common knowledge that apples will fall down to the earth from trees. However, it was Newton's imagination, the ability to think outside the box that made him come up with the laws of gravity. Mere knowledge about the falling apples was transformed to a path breaking finding because of the imagination.
To conclude, Imagination without knowledge or knowledge without imagination will not take us very far. It is only when they are combined, they become potent.
Imagination is better than knowledge ?. A tricky question to answer. Similar to the chicken and the egg scenario, it is not always possible to clearly define what is more important.
Take the case of Adam and Eve. When they were frolicking in the garden of eden, all their imagination would not have helped them had they not had the knowledge of what is wrong and what is right. It is the knowledge, the capacity to differentiate between right and wrong that helped them move mankind forward. In effect, imagination without a semblance of knowledge would not be very effective.
On the other hand, take the case of Newton and the apple. It was common knowledge that apples will fall down to the earth from trees. However, it was Newton's imagination, the ability to think outside the box that made him come up with the laws of gravity. Mere knowledge about the falling apples was transformed to a path breaking finding because of the imagination.
To conclude, Imagination without knowledge or knowledge without imagination will not take us very far. It is only when they are combined, they become potent.
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Secret of Success
How to become a Millionaire in a month ?. How to lose 20 kgs in week ?. How to become an expert speaker in a day ?
These are some of the catchy phrases used by people, who want us to use their products. Lured by the attraction of instant results, some of us buy these products and then find that they do not deliver what they actually promise.
Imagine the sort of response these companies would get, if they were to change their advt along the following lines,
How to become a Millionaire after 20 years of hardwork and shrewd investment ?. How to lose 20 kgs after a year of strenous exercise and dieting ?.
In our society, the fruits of success is displayed everywhere, but seldom do we get to see the secrets behind it.
So, what exactly are these secrets ?
1) Setting you objectives clearly
When it comes to setting objectives, most of us do not have a problem, often setting very high objectives. If we are a cricketer, we want to be the next Sachin, If it is a software engineer, we would like to be the next Bill Gates. While there is nothing fundamentally wrong with having such lofty ambitions, we are bound to face quiet a lot of failures in trying to measure up to those lofty standards. With each failure, our resolve to excel decreases and finally we set aside our original goals and settle for more managable mediocre standards.
How do we then keep up the motivation to pursue our goals ?. The secret lies in splitting the objective into smaller targets that can be tracked within specific time frames. For example, if a budding athlete wants to the olympic champion in 100 m sprint, which requires him to run the race in less than 10 sec, he might adopt the following goals,
Target to run the state level of the race (timing 11-12 sec) in the next 6 months.
Target to run the national championships (timing 10.5-11 sec) in the next 12 - 24 months.
Target to run the asian games (10 - 10.5 sec) in the 24-48 months and
finally the olympics if he can manage the timing of less than 10 secs.
With this approach, the athlete is constantly focussed on short-term goals and with every target that is achieved, the motivation levels for reaching the next target increases.
2) The second key to success lies in Innovation. More often than not, we fail to innovate because of the fear of failure. Although most of us know that failures are the stepping stones for success, we prefer to have those failures in private. The reason for fearing failures is primarily because, we tend to attach our egos to our performance. So when our idea is rejected by some one, it is our ego which is hurt. If our speach is criticised by some one, it is our ego which is hurt and consequently we turn defensive. If we can learn to separate our egos from our performances, we can handle our failures with a lot more confidence and consequently attempt innovation more easily. The ability to innovate and differentiate us from the rest is a key success factor. This is why, A.R. Rehman will always be appreciated more than Anu Mallik, Sachin Tendulkar will always be appreciated more than a Shewag. Remember, it is the originals which are appreciated, the clones are merely tolerated !
3) The third key to success lies in continious learning. Every year, we goto our bosses and ask for a salary increase. Seldom do we ever stop to think about " what have I learnt last year ?", "What is the increased value that I am going to deliver this year ?", "Why should my company pay me more this year ?".... Most of us tend to work hard to reach a level in life and then take it easy for the remaining period. Some of us stop learning as soon as the university education is over. Some of us stop learning as soon as we find that brilliant job that we always wanted, Some of us stop learning as soon as we get married....
The danger with this approach is being replaced by an alternative, when one is available. For example, the advent of Yuvraj singh has made Ganguly's position shaky. If we do not keep up with the latest trends, we will be sidelined in the near future.
Remember, by setting managable objectives, striving to innovate and learning continiously, we can better utilise the dormant potential in all of us. This increased confidence will let us give the thumbs down sign, when somebody comes telling you that it is possible to become a Millionaire in a month .......
These are some of the catchy phrases used by people, who want us to use their products. Lured by the attraction of instant results, some of us buy these products and then find that they do not deliver what they actually promise.
Imagine the sort of response these companies would get, if they were to change their advt along the following lines,
How to become a Millionaire after 20 years of hardwork and shrewd investment ?. How to lose 20 kgs after a year of strenous exercise and dieting ?.
In our society, the fruits of success is displayed everywhere, but seldom do we get to see the secrets behind it.
So, what exactly are these secrets ?
1) Setting you objectives clearly
When it comes to setting objectives, most of us do not have a problem, often setting very high objectives. If we are a cricketer, we want to be the next Sachin, If it is a software engineer, we would like to be the next Bill Gates. While there is nothing fundamentally wrong with having such lofty ambitions, we are bound to face quiet a lot of failures in trying to measure up to those lofty standards. With each failure, our resolve to excel decreases and finally we set aside our original goals and settle for more managable mediocre standards.
How do we then keep up the motivation to pursue our goals ?. The secret lies in splitting the objective into smaller targets that can be tracked within specific time frames. For example, if a budding athlete wants to the olympic champion in 100 m sprint, which requires him to run the race in less than 10 sec, he might adopt the following goals,
Target to run the state level of the race (timing 11-12 sec) in the next 6 months.
Target to run the national championships (timing 10.5-11 sec) in the next 12 - 24 months.
Target to run the asian games (10 - 10.5 sec) in the 24-48 months and
finally the olympics if he can manage the timing of less than 10 secs.
With this approach, the athlete is constantly focussed on short-term goals and with every target that is achieved, the motivation levels for reaching the next target increases.
2) The second key to success lies in Innovation. More often than not, we fail to innovate because of the fear of failure. Although most of us know that failures are the stepping stones for success, we prefer to have those failures in private. The reason for fearing failures is primarily because, we tend to attach our egos to our performance. So when our idea is rejected by some one, it is our ego which is hurt. If our speach is criticised by some one, it is our ego which is hurt and consequently we turn defensive. If we can learn to separate our egos from our performances, we can handle our failures with a lot more confidence and consequently attempt innovation more easily. The ability to innovate and differentiate us from the rest is a key success factor. This is why, A.R. Rehman will always be appreciated more than Anu Mallik, Sachin Tendulkar will always be appreciated more than a Shewag. Remember, it is the originals which are appreciated, the clones are merely tolerated !
3) The third key to success lies in continious learning. Every year, we goto our bosses and ask for a salary increase. Seldom do we ever stop to think about " what have I learnt last year ?", "What is the increased value that I am going to deliver this year ?", "Why should my company pay me more this year ?".... Most of us tend to work hard to reach a level in life and then take it easy for the remaining period. Some of us stop learning as soon as the university education is over. Some of us stop learning as soon as we find that brilliant job that we always wanted, Some of us stop learning as soon as we get married....
The danger with this approach is being replaced by an alternative, when one is available. For example, the advent of Yuvraj singh has made Ganguly's position shaky. If we do not keep up with the latest trends, we will be sidelined in the near future.
Remember, by setting managable objectives, striving to innovate and learning continiously, we can better utilise the dormant potential in all of us. This increased confidence will let us give the thumbs down sign, when somebody comes telling you that it is possible to become a Millionaire in a month .......
Friday, January 06, 2006
Positive thinking
Dear friends,
A very big hi from the desert dunes of Dubai. Through this blog, I would like to share my thoughts and interests with you. My first post is about Positive thinking. I had given a speech in toast master international recently on this subject and would like to share it with others.
Last week, my cousin was working on her science project, getting a light bulb to glow in response to sound. When she couldn't get it right, I was asked to help. When I inter-changed the negative terminal with the positive terminal, the bulb glowed... More often than not, when you replace negatives with positives, there is bound to be light.
Most of you would have seen the movie Independence day, where an alien ship invades the earth. All the initial attempts at shooting it down fails because of the magnetic shield surrounding it. When the shield is penetrated later, the missiles reach their targets. Most of us are like the alien ship, surrounded by a circle of negativity. Unless we use positive thinking to penetrate this circle, seldom can we achieve greatness.
So how exactly can we get rid of this circle of negativity ?.
The first and foremost step is to differentiate between the negative and positive thoughts and to keep the negative thoughts away. When we go on a food diet, we tend to differentiate between the healthy food and the not so healthy ones. Along the same lines, we can differentiate between a positive thought and a negative one. During this process, there will be occasions where the negative thought creeps onto your mind. However, the challenge lies in not dwelling on the thought.
The second step in this direction is to take responsibility for our actions. When we achieve success in our lives, all of us are very happy to take credit for it, crediting it to our intelligence and hard work. However, when there is a failure, we very quickly identify external factors that caused the failure. Taking the Dubai driving test as a example, most of the students who fail the test give the following reasons for failure
1) Drove very well, yet I failed.
2) Was never taken to a round-about, yet was failed citing the inability to negotiate one.
3) Drove better than the other guy in the car, yet he passed and I failed
Very few students will actually step forward and say, " I drove badly and hence I failed"..... On the contrary, almost 100% of the students who succeed in the test will attribute their success to good driving !. The key to developing positive thinking is to respect our failures and learn from them. The more we learn from them, the lesser are the chances of repeating those mistakes.
The third step step towards developing positive thinking is to become the change that we like to see in the society. All of us want this world to become a better place and we continue to express our dissatisfaction with things that are not upto the mark. A peek into the letters to the editor of any newspaper will reveal a host of complaints on the different subjects, ranging from the bad driving habits in Dubai, the disparity between public and private sectors, etc. When it comes to evaluating others, we set very high standards. When we see a mediocre movie, we are very quick to criticize the director and actors. When it comes to a cricket match, we throw mud on players who do not give their 100%.
However, when it comes to own personal self, we settle for mediocre standards. Unless every individual tries to become the change that he likes to see in others, very things will change in the society.
To summarise, we can remove the circle of negativity by differentiating between positive and negative thoughts, taking responsibility for our actions and trying to become the change that we like to see in others. Remember, if we replace the negatives with the positives, there is bound to be light
A very big hi from the desert dunes of Dubai. Through this blog, I would like to share my thoughts and interests with you. My first post is about Positive thinking. I had given a speech in toast master international recently on this subject and would like to share it with others.
Last week, my cousin was working on her science project, getting a light bulb to glow in response to sound. When she couldn't get it right, I was asked to help. When I inter-changed the negative terminal with the positive terminal, the bulb glowed... More often than not, when you replace negatives with positives, there is bound to be light.
Most of you would have seen the movie Independence day, where an alien ship invades the earth. All the initial attempts at shooting it down fails because of the magnetic shield surrounding it. When the shield is penetrated later, the missiles reach their targets. Most of us are like the alien ship, surrounded by a circle of negativity. Unless we use positive thinking to penetrate this circle, seldom can we achieve greatness.
So how exactly can we get rid of this circle of negativity ?.
The first and foremost step is to differentiate between the negative and positive thoughts and to keep the negative thoughts away. When we go on a food diet, we tend to differentiate between the healthy food and the not so healthy ones. Along the same lines, we can differentiate between a positive thought and a negative one. During this process, there will be occasions where the negative thought creeps onto your mind. However, the challenge lies in not dwelling on the thought.
The second step in this direction is to take responsibility for our actions. When we achieve success in our lives, all of us are very happy to take credit for it, crediting it to our intelligence and hard work. However, when there is a failure, we very quickly identify external factors that caused the failure. Taking the Dubai driving test as a example, most of the students who fail the test give the following reasons for failure
1) Drove very well, yet I failed.
2) Was never taken to a round-about, yet was failed citing the inability to negotiate one.
3) Drove better than the other guy in the car, yet he passed and I failed
Very few students will actually step forward and say, " I drove badly and hence I failed"..... On the contrary, almost 100% of the students who succeed in the test will attribute their success to good driving !. The key to developing positive thinking is to respect our failures and learn from them. The more we learn from them, the lesser are the chances of repeating those mistakes.
The third step step towards developing positive thinking is to become the change that we like to see in the society. All of us want this world to become a better place and we continue to express our dissatisfaction with things that are not upto the mark. A peek into the letters to the editor of any newspaper will reveal a host of complaints on the different subjects, ranging from the bad driving habits in Dubai, the disparity between public and private sectors, etc. When it comes to evaluating others, we set very high standards. When we see a mediocre movie, we are very quick to criticize the director and actors. When it comes to a cricket match, we throw mud on players who do not give their 100%.
However, when it comes to own personal self, we settle for mediocre standards. Unless every individual tries to become the change that he likes to see in others, very things will change in the society.
To summarise, we can remove the circle of negativity by differentiating between positive and negative thoughts, taking responsibility for our actions and trying to become the change that we like to see in others. Remember, if we replace the negatives with the positives, there is bound to be light
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